We often, if not repeatedly, hear the well meaning advice to stay focused on our goals to achieve them. Makes sense right? Keep your eye on the goal, stay focused, don’t lose sight and get distracted!

What if that is actually counter productive for us women? We are cyclic. There will be times during the month we are Super-Focused, other times we are Less-Focused. This is our design and just part of us as women.

Our hormones are not the only reason that “just stay focused” is ill advice. Women are NATURALLY MORE focused than the typical man. It is not something we need to consciously practice.

Women have more P Ganglion Cells in our retinas which means we see the world through a Focused lens that sees more detail naturally. Men have more of the M Ganglion cells which means they are more Peripheral naturally, designed to see a wider view of the world. This kept them aware and safe while hunting in the wild. Men have to Consciously choose to focus. This is where the advice to FOCUS came from -a man’s perspective to employ a conscious action.

Ladies, have you ever met up with a friend, and ask “How are you?” They smile, say ‘fine’ but you know something is not quite right. You pick up on subtle changes, minute details of their expression, the waver and tone of their voice, their posture, and know everything is not fine, We are naturally designed to read another person’s face without effort. This is not a strategy we need to learn.

Women and men literally see the world differently!

This naturally focused state is why most women hate goal setting. Telling a woman to focus on a goal, will get her even more focused, causing stress because she can’t see anything else. The super focus forces what comes naturally. The harder and longer you engage in more focus, causes frustration, fear, burnout, a sense of failure, ‘cause we’re not further along in our goals.

Ladies, we need to be more in a peripheral state to destress, activate our parasympathetic nervous system that keeps our body and mind calm, relaxed, allowing rest and repair, and we can return to goals with renewed energy. Self-care is a NEED TO for us, not a nice to, when I have time to.

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